There are many schools of thought that explain how to manifest a particular goal. Countless books on the Law of Attraction, positive thinking and affirming your dreams into existence fill our shelves. Whilst each of these concepts are beneficial and offer success in their own way, what would happen if there was a way to change just one thing to create all things?
It is the way we are wired.
If we are honest with ourselves, we all want the loving partner, a family, the house, the car, the holiday, the money, good health, friends, happiness, love, success ...the list is endless....
We may have been taught that we can’t have everything, or that we don’t deserve to have everything, but, if were honest - we still want everything.
No matter what the dream is, at its core, in every case the desire to see a dream fulfilled is to fill a void , remove pain or dissatisfaction from our lives.
If we put it into plain words, the only reason why we pursue our dreams, is because we think that we are going to feel better once we have it.
Certainly for a short while we do. We revel in the excitement of reaching our goal, and we are pleased with our achievement. Do you notice though that in most cases we find that to be short lived? It doesn’t seem to take long for that old familiar feeling of dissatisfaction to creep in and we quickly set our sights on acquiring or fulfilling the next dream.
It could be because the nature of our being is to continuously expand and grow so it is impossible to become stagnant and stop growing. It could also be because there is always something bigger and better to pursue, or maybe it has to do with the fact that achieving dreams and goals on surface level is simply treating the symptom of an issue and not the cause.
You may be familiar with the concept that we are a threefold being – made up of a mind, a body and a spirit.
For the purpose of this dialogue we will divide it into the two areas of the spirit or the soul and the mind/body.
Everybody has a soul and it is that part of us that is sacred and eternal.
The soul is perfect whole and complete and lacks nothing. It is part of the whole and as such is created in the energy of perfection. It does not need to learn anything, but rather simply remember.
On the other hand looking at things from the view of human psychology, all people like the soul need to belong, feel connected and be self expressive. It is part of the basic psychology that is common to all people. Part of this sense of belonging is to feel recognised for WHO we are, more than WHAT we do, to feel valued and most importantly loved.
It doesn’t matter who you are male, female, young or old. No matter your religion, financial status, race, culture, life experiences or beliefs, all humans without exception want and need to experience the EMOTION of connection.
It is critical then, that we feel this sense of being important, valued, special and validated and most importantly loved as it helps not only to remind us of the connection to WHO we really are but also the connection to all things.
It is instrumental in helping you to feel safe, secure and accepted – A sense of belonging
When we seek to achieve a dream, what we really are looking for is the feeling that obtaining the dream will bring. In the example of having more money, even though it may not seem like it at the time, it is not the actual money that we yearn. Rather it is the feeling that the money will bring. For some people it will be the feeling of security and stability, for others freedom, for others still it is about the ability to express their spirit through experiences that otherwise would not be possible.
The money in this instance is the vehicle used to express these emotions. It is never about the “thing” it is always about the feeling.
In short your body and mind is the vehicle through which your soul can express itself. Science has shown that the mind can only process information based on its perception of what it has experienced, or what it has been taught. New ideas and pieces of insight are sparks of inspiration delivered to the mind from the soul. Your soul cannot survive in the physical world without the expression through the body and the body could not live a life of any meaning without the inspiration of the soul. The two go hand in hand and the alignment of this is critical for effortless growth, expansion and the delivery of your desires.
Given then that the soul and the mind/body have the same agenda – that is to feel loved, accepted, to have the freedom to express itself freely, to grow and expand it would make sense that if the two things were aligned, and both aspects of self would be working toward a common goal then life would be wonderful
When our soul, mind and body are in balance, our life works and happiness is the result. Amazing experiences just happen as if by magic, our dreams come true, the things we have our sights on suddenly appear with no real effort our part. Life just flows. Life is filled with smiles, peace, hope and excitement.
Sadly much of the time this is not our experience. Things don’t flow. Life is a struggle. Pursuing our dreams takes a back step to surviving our every day. There are many reasons why this could happen.
Sometimes it is as a result of a specific event that sends things into a spiral or sometimes life just gets in the way. Anything from a difficult work situation, heavy financial obligations, relationship issues, poor health, or sometimes it happens that life is just a challenge for no real reason.
The cause of this experience is the misalignment in the communication between our soul and our mind/body.
When we are in this saddened, low, and sometimes devastated state, a great deal of energy, strength and effort is required to push through. It ultimately affects the direction and the quality that our lives take, and it most certainly affects that length of time it takes for our dreams and better feeling things to come to fruition
Whatever the reason or the problem, this type of experience brings pain.
It may be subtle at first.
In most cases you brush it off and put it down to “one of those things” and soldier on.
Then the dissatisfaction grows stronger, deeper. Here you start to feel empty and alone despite the fact that the outside world perceives that you have all the ingredients of a “perfect life” Here you know that there is something missing but can’t quite put your finger on what it is or what to do to make things better. Rather than seeing the gifts, you start to focus on the imperfections in your life.
Perhaps you are unwell, suffering from a physical illness, restless; you may feel like you are in the wrong job, you don’t have enough money, want more excitement in your life or that you wish for more friends.
Here you focus in what is missing. This is the where you tell yourself that if I had a bigger house, a loving partner, more money, if I was able to travel, buy a new car, find a new job, if I were healthier I would be happy.
You then become frustrated and resentful that everybody around you appears to be living the fairytale lifestyle filled with all the magic, enchantment and opportunities that you wish were yours , but no matter what you do and how hard you try there still just seems to be no way for you to create this in your world.
At its core though, there is dissatisfaction, disillusionment and a desire for change that simply will not go away.
More often than not the motivation is subconscious, but at this point we look for things to bring us comfort.
People misunderstand this feeling and try and remedy it with something outside of themselves and in many cases it can often take the form of something addictive. Perhaps food, alcohol , drugs or even chocolate!! (this drowns out the yearning and the inner guidance). Some people are addicted to dramas in life and the life of those around them (helps makes them feel validated – gives them purpose). Some others become addicted to health issues. They seem to constantly be at the doctor’s surgery (looking for attention and nurturing). Some choose to abuse their bodies in various ways, while looking for love in all the wrong places. Some live a life of anger and rage (looking to feel in control and safe) while some others give up their power by looking to others for guidance and direction such as a psychic or a seemingly well meaning family member rather than trusting their own knowledge (looking for certainty and security)
When those experiences are present and working for us, we feel amazing, elated, and invincible.
When they leave or have been taken away we feel devastated, shattered and totally distraught.
When things are amazing, they are amazing, but when things are not, if we allow it, those people and events have the capacity to affect our emotions in such a way that they can leave us crippled.
When we are in this saddened, low or devastated state, a great deal of energy, strength and effort is required to push through. It ultimately affects the direction and the quality that our lives take, and it most certainly affects that length of time it takes for better feeling things to happen.
There is no right and wrong and there is no judgment – except that which we put on ourselves or that we let others put on us. It is not a case of punishment, but simply requires a desire for correction or realignment to a path that would serve us better.
We become accustomed to our negative situation, so much so that even though our minds say we want it to change, the fear of changing is so intense and so deep, we choose to stay with the uncomfortable. Even though it is not perfect, it is familiar, we can handle it, we understand the ins and outs of it, and ultimately it becomes so familiar it becomes like a friend or companion to us as we carry it with us as we soldier on day after day.
We cannot fail. Our internal navigation system knows the way. It knows the perfect route that will take us exactly to where we want to be – often times to an even better place. This does not need to be a difficult journey. Sometimes even the slightest of shifts will set things in motion. The biggest problem is making the decision to change and then listening to what we feel and taking inspired action. The decision to change often takes effort and discipline, but once it happens the rewards are beyond anything that we can imagine